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Is your new relationship a rebound or something real? Elizabeth Jane unpacks the truth

Announcement posted by Invigorate PR 19 Jun 2025

New relationships after a breakup can feel like hope, healing and a new beginning. But according to Elizabeth Jane, a respected wellbeing and mindfulness expert, relationship coach and author of Free and First - Unlocking Your Ultimate Life, they can also be a trap, masking unresolved pain and setting you up for deeper heartache.
 

Having rebuilt her life following a sudden and traumatic divorce after 25 years of marriage, Elizabeth Jane understands what it means to start over. Her journey from heartbreak to healing now informs her mission to help others reclaim their power, raise their energy and create meaningful relationships rooted in self-worth and truth.
 

Jane said rebound relationships are typically born out of avoidance rather than true alignment. After a breakup, many people are desperate to feel something that softens the emotional pain. A new partner may offer temporary relief from loneliness, guilt, rejection or shame.
 

"Rather than allowing space for reflection and emotional healing, the rebound relationship becomes a distraction. These relationships often progress quickly and intensely but lack the emotional stability and self-awareness required for long term connection," Jane said.
 

"The foundation is fragile because it is built not on genuine compatibility, but on the need to be needed."
 

When this dynamic goes unrecognised, it can lead to a cycle of emotional dependence, disappointment and further damage, not only to the individual, but to the person unknowingly filling the rebound role.
 

The hidden signs you are in a rebound relationship
 

"Most people do not realise they are in a rebound relationship until things begin to unravel. One major red flag is lingering emotional attachment to an ex. If conversations still centre around the past, or if emotional comparisons are being made, whether aloud or internally, it's a sign that emotional closure hasn't occurred," Jane said.
 

"Another common sign is how quickly the relationship escalates. Rebound relationships often move too fast, with an urgent need to define the connection early and fill the emotional void left by the breakup. This can create the illusion of closeness and chemistry, when in reality it's emotional projection, not genuine bonding."

 

Jane said these relationships are frequently marked by emotional highs and lows. The focus is often more on how the relationship makes someone feel validated, wanted, distracted, rather than a deep, mutual understanding of who the other person truly is.
 

Why people rush into new relationships too soon
 

Jane believes the root of most rebound relationships is discomfort with emotional pain.
 

"For many people, especially those used to staying in control, sitting still with sadness or uncertainty is almost unbearable. They seek relief through attachment. Rather than process the grief or explore the lessons, they reach for the emotional band aid of a new relationship," she said.
 

"Unresolved pain doesn't disappear, it resurfaces. It will show up again in the next relationship, the next impulsive choice or the next emotional breakdown. How you feel is what you attract. If you are holding onto pain, fear or insecurity you are likely to draw in relationships that mirror those feelings."
 

How to know if your relationship is worth pursuing
 

Not every relationship that begins after a breakup is destined to fail. Elizabeth said some can evolve into something meaningful, if both people are emotionally available, aware and willing to grow together.
 

"The difference comes down to intention. If you've taken time to reflect, rebuild your self-worth and understand what you truly want and need in a partner, then you may be ready. But if the relationship is about avoiding pain or proving something to yourself or someone else, it likely won't last," Jane said.
 

Why self-honesty and support matter
 

Elizabeth encourages people to be deeply honest with themselves.
 

"If the new relationship feels like a band aid, there's no shame in pausing. Giving yourself time and space to heal is an act of strength, not weakness," Jane said.
 

Seeking professional guidance can also help break the cycle of emotional reactivity and foster healthier patterns.
 

"Rushing into the next chapter won't heal the last one, but if you slow down, do the inner work and seek clarity, you'll stop repeating old stories and start creating the relationship and life you truly want," Jane added.
 

About Elizabeth Jane
 

Elizabeth Jane is an Australian artist, author and public speaker. She uses a selection of painting media in her art, including acrylic oil and water colour. Digital and canvas versions of her art are available for purchase through her website. Jane's debut book, 'Free and First—Unlocking Your Ultimate Life', was written as part of her healing process following her divorce, which ended a 25- year marriage. Jane aims to develop wellness centres and healing sanctuaries focused on helping people to recover from relationship breakdowns and other life issues.
 

https://elizabethjane.com.au/

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