Elizabeth Jane: Dating at 60 - How to find love safely and confidently

As more Australians in their 50s and 60s re-enter the dating world following divorce, separation or loss, relationship experts are warning that the biggest mistake many people make is approaching dating later in life the same way they did decades ago.
 

According to best-selling author, key note speaker and emotional wellbeing thought leader Elizabeth Jane, the dating landscape has changed dramatically and those who adapt are far more likely to find meaningful and lasting connections.
 

Elizabeth Jane endured a sudden and heartbreaking divorce and shared her journey, learnings, tips and insights in her acclaimed book, Free and First - Unlocking Your Ultimate Life, to help others survive and thrive beyond divorce and other life challenges.
 

"Dating at 60 is not about trying to relive your twenties," Jane said. 
 

"It's about being clear, practical and emotionally intelligent. The people who succeed are those who approach it with strategy, boundaries and self-awareness."
 

Based in Sydney and a mother of four adult children, Jane said she is seeing a surge in people seeking guidance on how to date confidently and safely in this new stage of life.
 

"People are living longer, healthier and more socially active lives. Many are financially independent and emotionally stronger, but they are also navigating online dating, blended families and different expectations about relationships," she said.
 

"The truth is, many people don't know where to start or what to do.  This is the biggest challenge for people who want to meet a life partner."
 

Jane outlines her tips on dating at 60.
 

Our inner state matters
 

"Our inner state or how we are feeling dictates what type of relationship we attract into our lives. If we are carrying baggage of stale beliefs, resentment, grief, fear, insecurities or unresolved pain we tend to draw in relationships that reflect those feelings," Jane said. 
 

It makes sense to allow space to process these heavy emotions first so as not to block the love connection you truly desire. "

Heal yourself and get to know yourself
 

"It's important to first lift our energy by healing old wounds, celebrating your strengths and by allowing self-love to become your foundation," Jane said. 
 

"If you have been in a long codependent relationship sideling your needs, you may need to rediscover you, what matters to you and what brings you joy."  
 

Be clear about your goals before you start
 

Jane said the next step is deciding what you actually want.
 

"Are you looking for companionship, a long-term relationship, travel, fun or emotional support? Many people date without clarity and end up frustrated," she said.
 

She recommended writing down non-negotiables and deal-breakers before meeting anyone.
 

"This reduces wasted time and emotional energy and it also helps you be very practical," she said.

"If you are unsure about how to work through these things, catch up with a girlfriend who you trust and create a list and work through it."

Protect your time, finances and boundaries

Jane said people in this age group must also be mindful of financial and emotional risks.
 

"We are seeing an increase in romance scams and financial manipulation targeting older Australians," she said.
 

She encouraged people to avoid sharing personal or financial details too early and to seek independent advice before making major decisions.
 

"Your independence and security must come first," she said. 
 

She also said setting of clear boundaries around availability, communication and expectations prevents resentment and provides a solid foundation for the relationship to develop. 
 

"At this stage of life, your time is valuable. Romance scams are on the rise. While online forums, social media and other digital environments may seem promising and convenient, be careful and skeptical. I strongly advise to stay away from them," Jane emphasised. 
 

Focus on lifestyle compatibility, not chemistry alone
 

Jane said practical alignment is just as important as attraction.
 

"Do you want to travel? Do you want to stay close to family? Do you enjoy similar routines? These questions matter far more than superficial chemistry," she said.
 

She said many relationships later in life fail because people ignore lifestyle differences.
 

"Love alone is not enough.  Good communication and compatibility create longevity," she said.

Use technology but don't rely on it
 

Online platforms such a Tinder, Hinge and others are now the primary way people meet, but Jane said they should not be the only strategy.
 

"Avoid endless time-consuming texts but rather have a quick phone call and follow up to meet for a coffee during the day is often best. Avoid locking yourself into a boozy dinner that can cloud your judgement and may lock you in for a longer catch up with an unsuitable match," she said. 
 

"Join social groups, community activities, fitness classes or travel groups. The more you expand your world, the more opportunities you create."
 

She emphasised that meeting through shared interests often leads to stronger connections.
 

Communicate openly and early
 

Jane said all relationships benefit from honest conversations from the beginning.
 

"Discuss expectations around commitment, family, health and future plans early. It saves confusion and heartache later," Jane said. 
 

She said emotional intelligence is the most attractive trait.
 

"People want authentic, calm, grounded, kind partners who are emotionally aware and can communicate clearly and resolve challenges," Jane added. 
 

"Once you are radiating these qualities, you are more likely to attract such a partner."
 

Take your time and enjoy the process
 

"Take the time to learn as much as you can about a prospective partner before becoming emotionally invested. Understanding their background, values, family relationships and friendships gives you powerful insight into who they really are and whether they are aligned with your lifestyle, values and personal needs," she said.
 

"For many people, this is a form of healthy vetting. The way someone speaks about their past, treats others and maintains long-term relationships is often the clearest indicator of their character and emotional maturity."
 

Jane also recommended meeting in public places such as cafés, restaurants or group settings in the early stages to support both safety and comfort.
 

"This creates a more relaxed environment, reduces pressure and allows you to observe how they interact with the world around them," she said.
 

She encouraged people to view dating as a personal growth journey rather than a pass-or-fail exercise.
 

"Every connection teaches you something about yourself, your boundaries and what truly matters to you. The more self-aware you become, the more likely you are to build a healthy and fulfilling relationship," she added.

A growing trend in Australia
 

Jane believes the rise in dating at 60 reflects broader social and demographic shifts.
 

"We are seeing a generation redefining relationships, independence and ageing," she said.
 

"The key message is simple. Dating later in life can be exciting, empowering and deeply fulfilling when approached with clarity and confidence.
 

"The important thing is when you honour who you truly are, you stop chasing connection and start attracting alignment."
 

About Elizabeth Jane

Elizabeth Jane is a best-selling author, sought-after keynote speaker, artist and respected thought leader whose work has inspired thousands of people to live with greater clarity, confidence and emotional freedom. Her highly popular book, Free and First - Unlocking Your Ultimate Life has helped many people across the globe to navigate and move forward from divorce and other life challenges to find joy and happiness. Based in Sydney, she is a devoted mother to four adult children and a powerful advocate for wellbeing, resilience and authentic living.
 

A Commerce graduate who later completed a Diploma in Education, Elizabeth has built a multifaceted career as a mentor, spokeswoman and creative force. Her insights have shaped conversations across mental health, relationships and personal transformation, earning her a reputation as one of Australia's most compelling voices in the self-development space.
 

Beyond her writing and speaking engagements, Elizabeth is a passionate practitioner of yoga and meditation and an accomplished painter. Her artwork and storytelling share a unifying mission: to empower people with practical tools to cultivate purpose, emotional strength, vibrant health and enduring joy.
 

Whether through her books, commentary and insights, her art or her presence on stage, Elizabeth continues to encourage audiences to live deeply, love fully and embrace the most authentic version of themselves.
 

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