Could This Be The Solution Parents Have Been Waiting For?

Of all the challenges facing parents today, the one that stands out the most is how to keep their children safe and balanced online.  While the benefits of technology for education and entertainment are considerable, the pitfalls can be heart-breaking.

Most children and many parents find it difficult to tear themselves away from their screens and phones, and as a result the desired level of emotional connection between family members is often lacking. For the same reason, face-to-face social skills and the development of empathy (or lack of) is also a concern.

Cyber bullying is commonplace in primary schools and high schools, and often children as young as eight are exposed to it. Up to 16% of students who are the victims of cyber bullying seriously consider suicide, and 8% attempt it. Unfortunately about one in ten suicide attempts are successful.

Sexting is considered “normal” amongst tweens and teens and commonly leads to bullying, both online and in person. It also leaves children vulnerable to predators and can lead to extortion, sextortion and worse.

The prominence of pornographic content online, with more than 24 million sites (equating to about 12% of all websites on the internet) containing this content, means that there’s a very good chance most children will find this content at a young age by mistake. In fact not only are children as young as eight stumbling across it, but the average age to see it for the first time is just eleven years old.

Believe it or not the biggest consumers of porn online are aged between 12-17 years, and as a result these children consider the behaviour normal. Both boys and girls commonly believe this is what a healthy sexual relationship looks like, and consequently view others not as people with feelings but as sexual objects.

With all of this data at hand, one mother has taken drastic action to do something about it. Ruth Dearing, a mother of two living in Morisset, NSW has been researching the topic of online safety for several years. As a result of this research she has come up with some practical solutions to help parents keep their children safe and balanced online.

Dearing quickly discovered that one of the pressures felt by parents is how to keep up with technology. Children want to play the latest games on the latest devices, and use social media platforms their parents are simply unfamiliar with. Parents are often left behind, feeling somewhat helpless with the knowledge that their children are more tech-savvy than they are.

“Parents need to know what their children are playing and doing online so that they can be involved in their lives. That’s easier said than done with new games, apps and sites being released every day. Most parents simply don’t have the time to keep up with it all”, says Dearing.

To combat this issue Dearing has created a monthly membership group, where like-minded parents can share their stories in a closed Facebook group so that they can all benefit from each other’s experiences. “There’s no need to go through this parenting challenge alone. The Facebook group is for parents with children aged from five right up to sixteen to support each other and come up with strategies together for dealing with real life challenges as they happen”, she tells us.

Included in the membership is the latest information on technology such as reviews of apps, games and sites, the latest scams to be aware of, advice on safe social media use, and general tips on all things to do with online safety. Information is delivered fortnightly in the form of a newsletter or a video, and members gain access to all previous resources.

“Given the time restraints of most parents, the membership is designed to give parents the crucial information they need in less than an hour a month – far less time than it would take for them to keep up otherwise”, Dearing says.

For those wanting a more comprehensive answer to the question of how they can guide their children safely online, Dearing has developed an online training program she calls the “Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution” (named after her brand “Peaceful Digital Parenting”).  This program is designed to help parents with children aged between 3 and 12 years, the idea being that when it comes to mistakes that happen online, prevention is better than a cure.

“The Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution takes parents on a journey from feeling fearful of what their children may see or do online, to feeling peace of mind that their children can navigate their online world safely. Parents no longer feel overwhelmed by technology. This can only come from gaining and applying the knowledge needed to gain confidence in relation to all aspects of online safety.”

“Parents who have completed the Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution have enjoyed finding ways to not only keep their children safe online but to simultaneously strengthen their relationship with their children. We talk a lot about how to improve communication skills as this is key to achieving the end goal. These newly enhanced skills help parents strengthen their relationship not only with their children but also with everyone else they know, which is a big bonus,” says Dearing.

As well as creating the monthly membership and the Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution, Dearing has recently published a best-selling book called “How To Keep Your Children Safe Online…And Put An End To Internet Addiction”.  The book contains entertaining stories and statistics as well as practical tips and strategies that parents can implement straight away. It’s an easy read and is available as an ebook or a physical book.

In addition to the membership group, Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution and the book, Dearing regularly speaks directly with primary and high school students about online safety. She also speaks with parents of students in primary schools.

The risks of technology use are abundant and often lead children down the path of anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts.  If it was ever okay to bury your head in the sand in relation to online safety, that time has well and truly gone. The only decision left is what action to take to help your children stay safe and balanced online.